Waiting for the Urgent Mammogram - E-mail to my friend Larry.

Waiting for the Urgent Mammogram - E-mail to my friend Larry.

Hi Larry,

I have these unreal days. I got a call from the radiologist’s office and regardless of the outcome of the mammogram they are proceeding with appointments which apparently are easier to cancel than to set up. Thanks for the talk yesterday. I don't feel like I have beaten myself up so much today with negative thoughts on my negative thoughts which cause more negative thoughts all the while trying to be positive. It gets exhausting on top of the stress and lack of normality.

Larry, think of the following sounds.

A small, tuneless child hammering on the keys of a piano - a mosquito - an annoying cricket, at three in the morning that managed to get into your house but cannot be found - the steady drip of water from a faucet - nails on chalkboard. Now, add about ten more of your own least favorite noises.

Have all of these noises become an internal orchestra with no sheet music using your nervous system as an amplifier. Make them silent to the outside world. Then turn up the volume from time to time just for the fun of it.

Try to meditate. Try not to think about the worst case scenario which, by the way, extends to all the scary stories ever heard. That's how I feel today. Add money issues and a big presentation on Thursday which MUST be great!!! in order to stop the money issues.

On a positive note. I am intelligent enough and have the means to thoroughly research and make an informed decision not to put a drug in my body that I would put gloves on to clean off my floor. I am intuitive enough to follow through on my gut feel and call my GP's office to find out the status of the mammogram only to find out in their efforts to save me time they actually were going to cause me another week of delay, which is now corrected and as you know the event takes place on Friday.

I will pull it together for Thursday. Talk to you soon,

Laura